unlimited

So bored... so I've been reflectemplating (reflect + contemplating), sort of thing. With luck I won't get repetitious in my entries, I tend to in my own journals =b, because usually I think about the same things over and over and over again (talk about a one-track mind).

Today's particular train of thought was how the length of knowing some one hardly makes much difference in terms of friendship. It shouldn't matter too much, I concur, I just feel it's a pity that friendships can plateau so easily, at any given level... So much for a quote I once read: "Friends are lights in winter; the older the friend, the brighter the light".

For instance, I've known Joel rather long (since Form 1), but 'know' is so loose a term. 'Know' in this case just some one that's agreeable to talk to. Beyond that, I hardly know all that much about him. Ditto for many others... It's a superficial knowing on many accounts, on my part. Oddly enough, the one person I knew most about, I don't, not anymore... Hm. How things change, eh?

In more recent years, I've figured out friendships take a lot of effort to maintain and to cultivate... and I'm the lazy sort =b. But I'm inclined to think that real, deep friendships are the most amazing thing on earth. You know, the kind of friendships where talking is secondary and not too necessary. Where a third thing isn't required for both to divert attention to. Where the question is never 'Is anything wrong?' but 'What is wrong?' (in a figurative, symbolic sense). "[A] friend who can be silent with us in a moment of despair or confusion, who can stay with us in an hour of grief and bereavement, who can tolerate not knowing, not curing, not healing, and can face us with the reality of powerlessness..." said someone once.

Thing is, in our world today, deep friendships are hard to come by. With members of the same gender, there's the tendency for others to think 'gay' and stuff. With members of the opposite gender, rumours of love and attachment inevitably arise, and physical attraction gets in the way. There's no easy place in between acquaintanceship and love, is there? If there is I sure haven't found it yet =b. Social misfit, is that the word for me?

Anyhow, here's a beautiful thought I read somewhere once, though it is a bit alien to our tropical weather:

"With the falling of leaves, the mask of green are stripped off the hillsides, revealing the diversity and uniqueness of each ridge and valley, rock and stream, old shed or oil well hitherto unseen. It is in the winter, when the hills bare their innermost selves, that we get to know them. Then, in the spring, when the mask returns, we can look at the hills as old friends few people understand.
"So it is with people. Most of the time, we wear our masks. But during our difficult times, during the winters of our lives, we shed our facades and reveal all the intricacies of the unique beings we are. It is in these moments that friendships are formed, and we experience one another as few others ever will."

I'll probably talk about love some other time =b . Got quotes on that, too. I like these sort of quotes because they are like poetic snapshots of life (mixed metaphors, but there what do I care?).

Last thought: Isn't it funny how we talk least of the things we think of most? This lack impoverishes our conversations, and, ultimately, our lives as well.

That's just my point of view.